Usually when I write a blog I start with a brainstorm and an outline. I like to keep consistency in what I am speaking about to ensure the blog has a certain flow. I didn’t do that today. I am writing the words as they come into my mind and heart because I am a strong believer that mental health is one of the most intimate and raw conversations we can have together. I believe speaking about what’s going on inside our heads can’t be scripted, outlined, or brainstormed. The topic of mental health can be heavy and ugly and unhinged. If you are not currently in a state where you can address your mental health, please feel free to stop reading this blog and maybe go to an earlier blog that has a lighter topic. However, if you ever need to hear these words on a day you are feeling stronger, please come back—I will be here. 

I’ve always been the funny and feisty friend. I have always been seen as strong and determined by family and peers. And at the age of 32, I was diagnosed with a mental illness. Probably one that should’ve been diagnosed many years before. I live with generalized anxiety and depression and until around 9 months ago, I was ashamed. I didn’t want people to know this “secret” I carried around because I feared what they would think. Little did I know, someone needed to hear that it was okay to be funny and take mental health medication so they would feel more comfortable taking theirs. I needed to tell my story and show vulnerability so that someone would feel “normal” about their insecurities. I needed to shed tears of joy about my relationship with my therapist on Instagram to give someone the courage to find one of their own. 

I believe the biggest problem with mental health is that it is not taken seriously and not talked about nearly enough. It becomes too late to bring mental health to the forefront AFTER the things have happened. It becomes too late to talk about depression and suicide at your loved one’s funeral. Those conversations HAVE to begin now, and we have to erase the shame and stigma behind being treated for mental health conditions. 

If you are reading this, I consider you a friend and as your friend, if you need help finding resources for yourself or someone you love, please let me know. I am willing to google search, suggest, do whatever to help the people I know and love continue to see and look forward to tomorrow. Please don’t hesitate to reach out. 

Again, this blog isn’t typical for me. There aren’t any links or curated photos or fun playlist to share. There was no home décor or mention of trends. No outline, no brainstorm. I just wanted to let you know that it’s okay to not always be okay and never be afraid to ask for help in order to keep it all together.